Getting to know thy Neighbour ( neighbor)

[crustyasp46]

I am always curious about traditions and facts, about other people and countries, their lifestyles, their humour, their idiosyncrasies of their countries and the regions they live in.

So, thought I would give some provincial information and a little Canadian humour and share the Canadian thought process. I hope you will do the same and share some of your history fact or humour about where you live!

3dflagsdotcom_canad_large.gif (49.09 KiB) Viewed 7201 times

So, what do we as Canadians have to be Proud of? ...


Smarties
Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp
The size of our football fields, one less down, and bigger balls
Baseball is Canadian - First game: June 4, 1838 - Igersoll, ON
Lacrosse is Canadian
Hockey is Canadian
Basketball is Canadian
Apple pie is Canadian
Tim Hortons beats Dunkin' Donuts (a US company)
In the war of 1812, started by America, Canadians pushed the Americans back ... past their White House. Oh, did I mention that we also burned their White House?
Our civil war was fought in a bar - it lasted a little over an hour
A Canadian invented Standard Time
The Hudsons Bay Company (aka 'The Bay') is the world's oldest company
The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes ---- (I am not sure I needed to know that
We invented: Ski-doos, jet-ski, Velcro, Zippers, Insulin, Penicillin, Zambonies, and the telephone
A Canadian invented Superman

[attachment=beaver.gif[/attachment]
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA:

1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
5. Weed. The kind you smoke
6. Magic Mushrooms. In case the weed does not do the trick
7. Lots of rain so your car always looks clean, and no one can write "wash me" in the dirt on it.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA:

1. Big rock between you and B.C.
2. Ottawa who?
3. Tax is 5% instead of the approximately 200% it is for the rest of the country.
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN:

1. You never run out of wheat.
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
5. Daylight savings time? Who the hell needs that!

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA:
1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
5. In spring, you can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
6. In summer, you can spend time watching trucks and cars driving to Sask. or Ont.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO:

1. You live in the centre of the universe.
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC:

1. Racism is socially acceptable.
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada .
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo A*#!%!"

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK:

1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick.
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA:

1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
4. Your abandoned undersea coal mines now make US border crossings secret, easy and hassle-free.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND:

1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND:

1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
3. The workday is about two hours long.
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding.


The Official Canadian Temperature Conversion Chart
50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
· Californians shiver uncontrollably.
· Canadians plant gardens.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
· Italian cars won't start.
· Canadians drive with the windows down.

32° Fahrenheit (0° C)
· American water freezes.
· Canadian water gets thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
· New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
· Canadians have the last cookout of the season.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
· Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
· Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.

-109.9° Fahrenheit (-78.5° C)
· Carbon dioxide freezes makes dry ice.
· Canadians pull down their earflaps.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
· Ethyl alcohol freezes.
· Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.

-459.67° Fahrenheit (-273.15° C)
· Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.
· Canadians start saying, "Cold, eh?"
· Vancouver Canucks finally beat the Chicago Black Hawks in the playoffs.

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
· Hell freezes over.
· The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.




JOKE # 1

After the North American Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents
decided to go out for a beer. The guy from Corona
sits down and says, 'Hey Senor, I would like the world's best beer, a
Corona .' The bartender dusts off a bottle from
the shelf and gives it to him.

The guy from Budweiser says, 'I'd like the best beer in the world,
give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser.' The
bartender gives him one..

The guy from Coors says, 'I'd like the only beer made with Rocky
Mountain spring water, give me a Coors.' He gets it.


The guy from Molson Canadian sits down and says, 'Give me a Coke.'
The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives
him what he ordered.
The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, 'Why aren't
you drinking a Molson's?'

The Molson Canadian president replies, 'Well, I figured if you guys
aren't drinking beer, neither would I.'

CANADIAN JOKE #2

A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his
arm. His friend Doug stops him and asks, 'Hey
Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?'

'I got it for my wife, eh.' answers Bob.

'Oh!' exclaims Doug, 'Good trade.'

CANADIAN JOKE #3

An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie. He went to the neurosurgeon
and asked, 'Is there anything you can do to me
that would make me into a Newfie?'

'Sure it's easy.' replied the neurosurgeon. 'All I have to do is cut
out 1/3 of your brain, and you'll be a Newfie..'

He was very pleased, and immediately underwent the operation.
However, the neurosurgeon's knife slipped, and instead
of cutting 1/3 of the patient's brain, the surgeon accidentally cut
out 2/3 of the patient's brain.

He was terribly remorseful, and waited impatiently beside the
patient's bed as the patient recovered from the
anesthetic. As soon as the patient was conscious, the neurosurgeon
said to him 'I'm terribly sorry, but there was a
ghastly accident. Instead of cutting out 1/3 of your brain, I
accidentally cut out 2/3 of your brain.'

The patient replied 'Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit, monsieur?'

[Hot Trout]

Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he was from Scotland.
Sir Sandford Fleming invented Standard Time, he was born in Scotland.
Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in London in 1896.

Everything else is close enough

[crustyasp46]

Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he was from Scotland.
Sir Sandford Fleming invented Standard Time, he was born in Scotland.
Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in London in 1896.

Everything else is close enough

Sir Sandford Fleming, KCMG (January 7, 1827 – July 22, 1915) was a Scottish-born Canadian engineer and inventor, known for proposing worldwide standard time ...

Alexander Graham Bell was born in Scotland and is credited with inventing the concept of the phone before his arrival in Canada. However,, the actual phone and patent for it happened in Canada. There is some conflict with his patent, as the same day he applied for the Patent, Elisha Gray, was also at the patent office with a similar invention, and the controversy was over who was there first. Bell was awarded the patent, and when he did his first phone call he used Elisha Grays' concept to do so.

Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in London in 1896. You win this one, we Canadians should not be claiming this one.

[Hot Trout]

So that means that the INVENTOR of the Telephone was Scottish but that he registered his design in Canada

Did you know Crusty that I have an Uncle in Canada?

[crustyasp46]

I think you mentioned that once before, and I think you once mentioned that you have visited, around Owen Sound? I hope while you were here that everyone treated you well.

BTW is your Uncle into the old games and computers too? if he is

[Roman78]

Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone, he was from Scotland.
Sir Sandford Fleming invented Standard Time, he was born in Scotland.
Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in London in 1896.

Everything else is close enough

Sir Sandford Fleming, KCMG (January 7, 1827 – July 22, 1915) was a Scottish-born Canadian engineer and inventor, known for proposing worldwide standard time ...

Alexander Graham Bell was born in Scotland and is credited with inventing the concept of the phone before his arrival in Canada. However,, the actual phone and patent for it happened in Canada. There is some conflict with his patent, as the same day he applied for the Patent, Elisha Gray, was also at the patent office with a similar invention, and the controversy was over who was there first. Bell was awarded the patent, and when he did his first phone call he used Elisha Grays' concept to do so.

Alexander Fleming discovered Penicillin in London in 1896. You win this one, we Canadians should not be claiming this one.

I would say the invenrter of the phone is Johann Philipp Reis, because he did it 14 years before Bell.

Reis, like Bell would later do, had studied the organs of ear and the idea of an apparatus for transmitting sound by means of electricity had floated on his mind for years. Inspired by his physics lessons he attacked the problem, and was rewarded with success. In 1860, he constructed the first prototype of a telephone, which could cover a distance of 100 meters. In 1862, he again tried to interest Poggendorff with an account of his "telephon", as he called it.[6] His second offering was also rejected, like the first. The learned professor, it seems, regarded the transmission of speech by electricity as a chimera; Reis bitterly attributed the failure to his being "only a poor schoolmaster."

[crustyasp46]

I would say the invenrter of the phone is Johann Philipp Reis, because he did it 14 years before Bell.

Reis, like Bell would later do, had studied the organs of ear and the idea of an apparatus for transmitting sound by means of electricity had floated on his mind for years. Inspired by his physics lessons he attacked the problem, and was rewarded with success. In 1860, he constructed the first prototype of a telephone, which could cover a distance of 100 meters. In 1862, he again tried to interest Poggendorff with an account of his "telephon", as he called it.[6] His second offering was also rejected, like the first. The learned professor, it seems, regarded the transmission of speech by electricity as a chimera; Reis bitterly attributed the failure to his being "only a poor schoolmaster."

Reis monument in Gelnhausen:

220px-Johann_Philipp_Reis-Gelnhausen.JPG (25.09 KiB) Viewed 7174 times

In 1878 European scientists declared Reis to be the telephone's inventor
Since the invention of the telephone, attention has been called to the fact that, in 1854, M. Charles Bourseul, a French telegraphist, had conceived a plan for conveying sounds and even speech by electricity:

Suppose that a man speaks near a movable disc sufficiently flexible to lose none of the vibrations of the voice; that this disc alternately makes and breaks the currents from a battery: you may have at a distance another disc which will simultaneously execute the same vibrations. …It is certain that, in a more or less distant future, speech will be transmitted by electricity. I have made experiments in this direction; they are delicate and demand time and patience, but the approximations obtained promise a favourable result.

Bourseul deserves the credit of being perhaps the first to devise an electric telephone and try to make it; but Reis deserves the honor of first realising the idea as a device to transmit and receive sounds electrically.

So, our Canadian history books should read :

: Bourseul deserves the credit of being perhaps the first to devise an electric telephone and try to make it; but Reis deserves the honor of first realising the idea as a device to transmit and receive sounds electrically. Alexander Graham Bell was the first to patent the telephone,with controversy, and was he a forerunner to Gates and Zuckerberg?

I am so disappointed with our education system, they have lied to me

[Hot Trout]

Touche, whos next

[Roman78]

When i wiki for Velco is receive this:

Velcro is the brand name of the first commercially marketed fabric hook-and-loop fastener,[1] invented in 1948 by the Swiss electrical engineer George de Mestral. He patented it in 1955 and refined and developed its practical manufacture until its commercial introduction in the late 1950s.

I like this google and wiki for some facts. Did you know that the Walkman was invented by a German.

[crustyasp46]

So that means that the INVENTOR of the Telephone was Scottish but that he registered his design in Canada

Did you know Crusty that I have an Uncle in Canada?

Actually Bell patented the telephone in the States, but I think he wanted it patented in the UK first to have the European market, I am not sure if he accomplished this or not. I believe it was the year after that he got the Patent in the US, that he started the Bell Telephone Company, And here in Canada we know what a monstrosity that Ma Bell is. It is loved to be hated here, somewhat like Microsoft, hated but tolerated as a seemingly necessary evil.